A Community for Brides Planning their Wedding in Australia

 
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bubbles17
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:34 pm

Yeah, I completely understand what you mean and I know what you mean about guests wanting to contribute, however I think that by actually having the wishing well there you are going to put an 'expectation' on the guests attending and they may feel like they have to open their wallets and give. The cost of the ceremony is not all that much considering, and as a guest I don't think I would feel like I had to help cover the cost of me being there... I dunno.
 
Summer_bride
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:36 pm

A wedding is NOT A CHARITY!!! You don't donate just because its an expensive occassion, but because you want them there to see you married! The cost of the wedding shouldnt be on your mind when talking about wishing wells, you dont have one to recoup your losses!
 
Tarsha
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:37 pm

sidonie wrote:
I don't think the OP is a troll. Although I can understand the initial suspicion.

OP, have you really thought about this? Because it's something that any reasonable person would see for themselves without having to be told, is quite rude.



What is a "Troll" anyway in forum world. It's a bit rude if you asked me, I only asked a question - It's not like I attacked anyone! gosh!
 
Summer_bride
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Tue Oct 19, 2010 6:46 pm

A troll is someone that enters a forum deliberatly seeking to make trouble!
 
sidonie
Little Miss Pearl
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Tue Oct 19, 2010 7:00 pm

Yeah as Summer said..a troll is someone who makes an inflammatory statement in order to sit back and watch the fireworks

One reason people may have thought this was because you've only posted a few times....now that coupled with the actual content of your post..which some people here see as shocking...might make people think you were trolling.

Even with your explanation I still think putting the wishing well at the ceremony is really rude and if you're sending written invites for ceremony only..putting a mention of the wishing well is even ruder.
 
Tarsha
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Tue Oct 19, 2010 7:07 pm

everyones comments are much appreciated. As earlier stated I agree that it does depend on the 'type' people you are inviting - was just an idea, and I honestly dont think my guests would be offended if ot was done in good taste - it's not like I will have the well under spotlights! haha

will keep all your reactions in mind when making my final decision.

' Can kind of understand the Troll thing, but still find this more rude! I honestly think some people took my question a little out of context - my fault I should have been clearer. Live and learn.

Thanks all :D
 
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smiley4
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Tue Oct 19, 2010 7:39 pm

I totally understand that you're asking would it be offensive if the invitation states that if guests WANTED to they could make a donation to the wishing well. I have to say that I personally would be slightly offended, even though i know what your intentions are. I really think its best not to put anything with the invitation, and let the ceremony guests make their own minds up :D
 
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katw
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Tue Oct 19, 2010 8:48 pm

Tarsha wrote:
My question is....do you think it's rude to ask thos who come to the ceremony only to donate towards our wishing well, therefore having the wishing well at the ceremony?

Yes, extremely.

Would you feel offended if we invited you to the ceremony only, but still asked for you to donate to the wishing well?

I am not fond of ceremony-only invites and would be a bit offended if I received one. If said hypothetical invitation included any request for gifts - especially cash gifts - I would either give a card only, or decline all together.
 
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Miss2Mrs
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Tue Oct 19, 2010 9:04 pm

.
Last edited by Miss2Mrs on Wed Jun 15, 2011 3:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.
 
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sugarb_91
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Tue Oct 19, 2010 9:25 pm

I think its really bad manners to tell the ceremony guests about the wishing well (no matter how politely you word it in the invitation).

I would be very careful if you choose to go ahead with it, I would hate to think you would be wrecking some of your relationships because of it (oh and its been my experience that sometimes ppl tell you that they are fine with an idea to your face.... but you find out later that they are offended and just dont want to tell you. Just a little bit of advice gained from personal experience!).

I mean those comments in a nice way, and only wrote tham as you origninally said you wanted honesty :D
 
amberino21
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Tue Oct 19, 2010 9:48 pm

IMO, there is no way to 'tastefully' suggest to guests that there will be a wishing well at your ceremony for them to contribute to if they choose. We're not even making mention of gifts in our invitations and everyone is invited to the reception, as I think, even if you say you aren't demanding they give you something, there is still a sense of expectation.

If you're so interested in collecting contributions, then have a reception that costs less per head and invite all of your guests. At least that way it'd be half way acceptable to suggest monetary contributions
 
Tarsha
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Tue Oct 19, 2010 9:56 pm

ok ok ok, got the point. thanks everyone.
 
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Miss2Mrs
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Re: Wishing Well Issues

Wed Oct 20, 2010 9:22 am

:evil:
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