A Community for Brides Planning their Wedding in Australia

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45hl31gh
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What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Mon Jan 10, 2011 2:35 pm

I've been thinking about wedding etiquette today and I was thinking I've only been to 3 weddings but I've managed to be cranky about something EVERYTIME. And believe me I dont think I m that difficult a person. But it has been making me think eekkkk I don't want to annoy anyone on my wedding day or after it!? So I was I was thinking what have other brides and grooms done to annoy you guys on WC? Do you guys have any advice on what not to do!!!?? Or what your not going to do? haha

These are my annoyances

A relative of mine got married 2 years ago and her wishing well card was bigger than her invitation :S Peeved and I hadn't even got to the wedding haha. Then she invited 200 people to her ceremony and only 60 to her reception (thats fine by me) BUT she put the bloody wishing well right in the doorway at the ceremony with a large sign on it saying WISHING WELL and arrow? Then she had it at the reception (which I think it should have just been there). After the wedding I saw her and the whole time she bitched and whined about how much money she got, how some people only gave $100 and how much money she normally gives other people. Then she informed me they spent the money on their rates and electricity bill and car insurance. :S Then she posted a thank-you 8 months later just saying thanks for sharing our day and she hadnt worked for 6 months. :S

The next wedding I went to the brides mouth was FOUL she swore like a trooper the whole time

The last wedding I went to was by far the nicest but again disappointed with no thank-you and I went to so much effort with the gift it was very personalised!
 
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wishy
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Mon Jan 10, 2011 3:10 pm

Not sending a thank you note is a big no-no! 6 months late is better than nothing at all. The only thing that annoys me about some weddings is not enough dancing time, but most of the time i'm just happy to be there.
 
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Jennalee84
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Mon Jan 10, 2011 3:37 pm

I've had two annoying encounters at weddings...

One wedding - we never got a thank you card. Not only did we give the couple cash as requested, we also paid for travel and accomm etc to Hamilton Island to attend the wedding. I'm still annoyed at that one.

The other wedding - it was really hard to work out what was going on most of the day. The couple returned from photos through a back entrance of the venue and had their first dance in a different room. By the time we realised what was happening, we missed the dance - along with half the other guests, who were all standing around in the main room wondering what the hell was going on.
 
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Mon Jan 10, 2011 3:39 pm

Jennalee84 wrote:
The other wedding - it was really hard to work out what was going on most of the day. The couple returned from photos through a back entrance of the venue and had their first dance in a different room. By the time we realised what was happening, we missed the dance - along with half the other guests, who were all standing around in the main room wondering what the hell was going on.


I went to one like that aswell. I wasnt phased really, but I felt so bad for the bride's grandmother who missed the first dance.
 
helen9
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Mon Jan 10, 2011 4:26 pm

Nothing has really annoyed me at peoples weddings.
However I should take notes from you ladies and send out thank you's when the weddings over. I have never received one before and I've been to quite a few weddings. Perhaps it's a cultural thing...
 
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Mon Jan 10, 2011 4:37 pm

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Last edited by Nikkie on Mon Feb 07, 2011 7:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.
 
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MalinViktoria
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Mon Jan 10, 2011 4:45 pm

Nikkie wrote:
There was no DJ, it was an iPod only, that belonged the the groom's brother. So when the brother left with his mother and step dad, the music went too.


Wow, he couldn't leave it with his brother for one night, for his WEDDING?? 8O Some people are shocking.
 
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narileena
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Mon Jan 10, 2011 5:29 pm

I've been to a few Italian weddings where the Ceremony is early in the morning, 10-11am and then the Reception is not until 7 that night. Now that is annoying because the guests have to hang around, wherever they can (once it was a maccas lol for lunch because we were starving) and wait!! And being italian weddings it's usually a 10 course meal so you never get through everything and so much food is wasted.

was dinner time, we were expecting a meal, it was finger food only
oooh...that would annoy me! I could never have finger food as the main meal.
 
Teena354
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Mon Jan 10, 2011 7:46 pm

the no thank you card is a massive one for me, we travelled on two planes and then hired a car to drive 50kms each eay as well as paid for accommodation for two nights in wine country Victoria only to receive no thank you card. the big kick for my FH (as it was his friend who got married) was that another mate of his who also went to the wedding got a beautiful thank you note and some cigars for his "effort in attending the wedding as he knows it was a huge thing". My FH was really hurt (especially considering we both went, so it was double effort for us!) and we don't speak to those people any more and they certainly aren't invited to our wedding!

I personally also find it irritating having to DRIVE a large distance between the ceremony and the reception. I don't mind hanging around, but if it means that you are getting in the car after the ceremony and driving for 1+ hours it's really not fun. I am all for destination weddings - just make the whole wedding in one place!! :)
 
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Karza156
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Mon Jan 10, 2011 8:06 pm

I am another one who hates not getting a thankyou card as I think it's really bad manners. I also find it annoying when there is a MASSIVE break between the ceremony and reception,with nothing for guests to do.

Another little tip is to supply some water for guests at the ceremony. I went to a garden ceremony once on a very hot day (with no shade), but the couple hadn't thought to have jugs/glasses of water. A lot of the guests commented that they were getting very thirsty standing in the sun for so long with nothing to drink
 
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Mon Jan 10, 2011 8:07 pm

The last wedding I went to was a 'no children' wedding, with the exception of her own 5 year old son, and 3 year old daughter of one of the groomsman. That's all well and good, however those two little people ruined the whole wedding in my opinion.

During the ceremony, the young girl kept screaming out "HI DADDY, DADDY, DADDY DADDY HI DADDY DADDY HI" and so on... really loudly, which was cute to start with, but got really irritating as we couldn't hear the celebrant. Then the brides 4 year old son start yelling out things to both bride and groom during "YOU LOOK FUNNY MUM!" "Shut up Rob!" and so on. No one told him to be quiet, and the whole thing was like a comedy act including the kids.

Then at the adjoining reception...the speeches start and I can tell you I did not hear a word, as the son was constantly heckling the speech makers and yelling abuse like "You're a pooh head" and because people laughed he kept it up, and again no one told him to stop and listen, so it was all a waste of time and a wasted opportunity to hear those lovely speeches.

I know she couldn't exactly have not bought her old child to the wedding, but I think he needed to be under control and no one seemed to care that we didn't hear a thing.

It was sort of ironic though. The only kids to stuff it up are the only two allowed to come. Oh well, she seemed to have a ball anyway and that is what it is all about really.
 
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Mon Jan 10, 2011 9:10 pm

Karza156 wrote:
I am another one who hates not getting a thankyou card as I think it's really bad manners. I also find it annoying when there is a MASSIVE break between the ceremony and reception,with nothing for guests to do.

Another little tip is to supply some water for guests at the ceremony. I went to a garden ceremony once on a very hot day (with no shade), but the couple hadn't thought to have jugs/glasses of water. A lot of the guests commented that they were getting very thirsty standing in the sun for so long with nothing to drink

That is a great tip and I will keep it inundate for our wedding! Thanks!
 
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Tue Jan 11, 2011 10:47 am

I too have not been to many weddings myself. I have been to two in the last month, and the low key relaxed one which I thought was cheap, was soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much better!
The first one was a close friend, found it pretty average for the money she spent. We had to wait from 430pm until 7pm while they had photos, it wasnt on the invite that it was the case. We knew hardly anyone, and the friends of hers I did know, made no effort to socialise with me and my FH so we were left sitting alone in a small waiting room. Which we also had to pay for drinks if we wanted them. They eventually started a bar tab at 630 pm and bought finger food around. Sam problem as someone else mentioned, people were so hungry by the time waiters got near us the tray was empty!
At the reception, the bridal table was wayyy down the back behind the dance floor, so we could hardly see or hear what was going on. When it was time to cut the cake the grooms daughter stood beside them so was in every photo they took. ANd during speaches she was hanging out under the bridal table poking her head out, it took away from the emotions of the moment. I now know why lots of people dont like kids at weddings.
Also the DJ was average, know one danced. That part is a big thing to me. He also was telling people no drinks on the dance floor and I dont think it was his place to tell people, its a party FFS

Damn that was long haha hope I dont sound like a winger but it made me think of how NOT to have my wedding. We are having a destination wedding, and will DEF be giving thank you cards as people are travelling over seas for it
 
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Tue Jan 11, 2011 11:36 am

My cousin had a wedding recently. Along with the invitation was an envelope with the couple's name on it. I was annoyed because nothing was written about it, it was just expected and seemed very impersonal.
We did get a 'thank you'. However they were from Vistaprint, sent from the groom's parents and were completely generic.
I also got offended because my cousin had 'no children'. There were at least 5 there, but I wasn't allowed to take my new baby who was still being breastfed :(
 
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Tue Jan 11, 2011 11:46 am

Most annoyeing wedding i went to was wen the bride orgnised everything herself and did everything herself made it very hard to talk to etc. so you really need to try make time for all your guests.
Another was when the bride and groom left at 9pm and then just everyone else stayed very weird.
 
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Tue Jan 11, 2011 11:50 am

I went to my best friends wedding late last year, I wouldn't say I was 'annoyed' but there were parts which could have been better organised.

At the beginning of the reception guests were herded into a big room with a scattering of tables; we weren't sure if this was the reception or what; there were kids running around screaming; after a while we got some soft drinks which were flat, so didn't taste very nice, and a cheese plate. None of the bridal party were there and FH and I were sitting alone; we weren't sure what to expect.

After about half an hour or so, we were herded upstairs to where the reception was to begin, so it would've been nice to be told the part priot to this was supposed to be the 'canapes' section; the reception was nice, but FH and I were seated with a bunch of randoms who just spoke among themselves, I found it quite strange that my mate hadn't put me at a table with people we'd both been to high school with, as at least I would've vaguely known some people and been able to strike up conversation to see what had happened in peoples lives since high school.

I wasn't a fan of their photographer either, they didn't make any effort to get photos of guests with the couple, so I feel like we don't even have a nice picture to take from the experience.

FH and I ended up leaving early (before the cake was cut) because it was pretty awkward at our table; and my mates mother got a little bit too drunk and started telling people how she had her money on me being the bride for her son, and how she doesn't like the brides family, etc etc, so I figured I should remove myself from that situation before I offended the bride as I didn't want her to think I encouraged all the talk about how I should've married the groom. It was a bit awkward.

It was still a lovely wedding though and it just reinforces some ideas I have about my own weddings and things I'll be making sure happen, or are avoided.
 
cj2011
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Tue Jan 11, 2011 12:46 pm

oooh...that would annoy me! I could never have finger food as the main meal.


This has just made me super anxious!!!! We are hoping to have a cocktail style with a huge amount of selections, also with the cute boxes with fancy "main" type meals in them... It is the less formal style that appeals to us and the ability to have more guests and more special people to share our day with! I hope not having a the traditional "sit down" meal isnt going to annoy people! However, we intend on having more than enough food, just more of a party atmosphere! :D
 
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Tue Jan 11, 2011 1:08 pm

cj2011 wrote:
oooh...that would annoy me! I could never have finger food as the main meal.


This has just made me super anxious!!!! We are hoping to have a cocktail style with a huge amount of selections, also with the cute boxes with fancy "main" type meals in them... It is the less formal style that appeals to us and the ability to have more guests and more special people to share our day with! I hope not having a the traditional "sit down" meal isnt going to annoy people! However, we intend on having more than enough food, just more of a party atmosphere! :D


Don't worry too much, I think there is a difference when speaking about finger food, for example some people might call finger food some cheese on a cracker whereas some others might call a party pie IFYKWIM, we had a cocktail party basically for the same reasons you've mentioned and we had what we called tapas food, we called it that because to us it was a bit more substantial than what we call finger food and all in all guests ended up not even eating it all because they were very satisfied :D

Sorry to hijack :oops:
 
cj2011
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Tue Jan 11, 2011 2:01 pm

thanks that makes me feel so much better and yes I think we should call it "tapas" style too as it is definitely not "finger food" in the form of cheese and crackers!! We arent doing it for financial reasons in fact the foods we are going with cost lots more than the "sit down" packages!! :D :roll:
 
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Re: What has annoyed you about other peoples weddings?

Tue Jan 11, 2011 2:06 pm

Hrmm, a few things that have been a bit of a bother at weddings I have been to:
-no thank you
-crap food
-no aircon in the hall it was being held in, on a 40 degree day
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