A Community for Brides Planning their Wedding in Australia

 
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lolli
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Sun Jun 13, 2010 1:41 am

Dandelion wrote:
I'm really jumping the gun here, but does anyone know how chinese generational names work? FH and his siblings all have generational names, and as FH is the eldest grandson, we have agreed that we will try and give our kids chinese names, either as a generational name or a second middle name, or something along these lines. FH has no idea where the generational names come from, and all I can find from research is that they come from a 'poem' or similar. Anyone able to shed some light on this for us?


Traditionally every clan (of the same family name) would keep their own "genealogical record book" which not only list out names of past & present male kinsmen but also dictates names/characters for a certain number of future generations to come. Once they've run out of generational names from the book the chief at the time would select different characters to be used for future generations and the cycle continues. As for how the chiefs chose the names I think they just picked random characters, or from scrolls/poems passed down from their ancestors. I should also mention that only boys would be added to the book once they're born, as girls would be married off into another clan and adopt another family name.

I think it's a sweet gesture to continue this tradition but I'd say don't stress too much over finding the "correct" generational name - if such a record book still exists for your FH's clan it'd probably be very hard to track down. Nowadays there're no hard and fast rules, so pick a character that you both like the sound/meaning of - just like picking an English name really. :wink:
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Sun Jun 13, 2010 1:23 pm

ninja_kwan wrote:
Thanks SallyLily!!


you are welcome ninja! Glad it helped :P
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Sun Jun 20, 2010 1:18 am

Hi ladies!

I'm quite new to this forum. FH and I are planning to get married sometime in Autumn 2012. We're both Malaysian Chinese but FH is working in Brisbane so we're planning to have our wedding there. It's a challenge to plan my wedding from afar while I'm still in Malaysia!

Right now we've just decided that we'll have a wedding mass since FH and I are both Catholics. Since we're also Chinese, so we're considering the possibility of a tea ceremony as well. My own parents aren't the traditional kind so they wouldn't mind not having a tea ceremony but my grandma would probably be quite upset if she finds out! 8O

Personally, I wouldn't mind doing it but I was just wondering when would be the best time to do it. We can't possibly do it before the wedding mass because timing for the wedding mass is really important, wouldn't wanna risk running late to church. The only time I could think of is perhaps just before the dinner reception in the evening? It's kind of strange because usually tea ceremony is held in the morning, as far as I know.

We might be having a second reception back in Malaysia but that will most likely be about 1-2 weeks after our wedding. So alternatively, we could postpone our tea ceremony until then, since more relatives will be present.. but is it going to be really strange because the wedding is already over?!
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Sun Jun 20, 2010 11:29 am

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Re: Chinese Weddings

Sun Jun 20, 2010 12:38 pm

Hi MrsKo,

Thanks for the suggestion :) I was actually thinking of running off after the wedding mass to someplace nearby and nice for some wedding portraits with FH so I'm not so sure if there's time for the tea ceremony..... unless I have a morning wedding mass and a dinner reception then there's plenty of time in between.. but does that mean I have to do my make up and hair twice?? Once in the morning and another time in the evening for the reception?

Mum was saying, even if I have a tea ceremony in Australia, it will only be for relatives living in Australia who are able to attend.. the majority of my dad's relatives are still in Malaysia so I will definitely need a round 2 of tea ceremony again. Not to mention my grandma who's 80 years old, she won't be able to attend my wedding in Australia either.
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Sun Jun 20, 2010 6:37 pm

bryaneunice wrote:
Hi MrsKo,

Thanks for the suggestion :) I was actually thinking of running off after the wedding mass to someplace nearby and nice for some wedding portraits with FH so I'm not so sure if there's time for the tea ceremony..... unless I have a morning wedding mass and a dinner reception then there's plenty of time in between.. but does that mean I have to do my make up and hair twice?? Once in the morning and another time in the evening for the reception?

Mum was saying, even if I have a tea ceremony in Australia, it will only be for relatives living in Australia who are able to attend.. the majority of my dad's relatives are still in Malaysia so I will definitely need a round 2 of tea ceremony again. Not to mention my grandma who's 80 years old, she won't be able to attend my wedding in Australia either.


At this stage (it seems to chop and change like crazy) but we are having our tea ceremony just before the reception. We have pushed our ceremony to an hour earlier to accomodate this. Good hair and make-up shouldn't need to be re-done though, unless you wanted it to! If you have an up-do for your hair it should stay in place all day, and make-up should only need a touch up. But the best person to ask would be your make-up artist, when I asked mine she said she would provide me with some powder to do the touch up with.

If you have a 2nd tea ceremony in m'sia, will all your family from australia be able to go to that one? If so, you might be able to get away with only having a malyasian tea ceremony and not an aussie one. Just an idea :)
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Sun Jun 20, 2010 8:30 pm

Hi Dandelion,

That's the thing. Part of my mum's relatives will be in Australia, while the majority of my dad's relatives are in Malaysia. So I guess I would need to have the tea ceremony twice no matter how :? Just wondering where do you guys get the teapot set with the cups? I'm a Chinese but I was brought up the Western way so I know practically nothing about Chinese customs especially when it comes to wedding! FH doesn't really care whether or not we have a tea ceremony but his grandma might probably go angry if he doesn't do it.. and some relatives have also warned that there won't be ang pow given if we don't do it.

Just curious, what sort of tea do they serve during this ceremony anyway? I've heard that it's quite a sweet one, not the usual Chinese tea you drink everyday. Has got some red dates or something which has a special meaning to it? And.. won't we need some people on site to help us rinse those cups while we serve tea to the elders? My family is REALLY huge.. if I were to buy a cup for each and everyone of them, I would probably need about 50.
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Thu Jun 24, 2010 2:21 pm

bryaneunice wrote:
Hi Dandelion,

That's the thing. Part of my mum's relatives will be in Australia, while the majority of my dad's relatives are in Malaysia. So I guess I would need to have the tea ceremony twice no matter how :? Just wondering where do you guys get the teapot set with the cups? I'm a Chinese but I was brought up the Western way so I know practically nothing about Chinese customs especially when it comes to wedding! FH doesn't really care whether or not we have a tea ceremony but his grandma might probably go angry if he doesn't do it.. and some relatives have also warned that there won't be ang pow given if we don't do it.

Just curious, what sort of tea do they serve during this ceremony anyway? I've heard that it's quite a sweet one, not the usual Chinese tea you drink everyday. Has got some red dates or something which has a special meaning to it? And.. won't we need some people on site to help us rinse those cups while we serve tea to the elders? My family is REALLY huge.. if I were to buy a cup for each and everyone of them, I would probably need about 50.


Hi Bryaneunice,

I having two ceremonies too! One in Melbourne and another Dinner/Tea Ceremony in Hong Kong for my side of the family to introduce FH to my relatives (majority of them haven't met him yet). I'm thinking of just getting a Teapot Set with 12 cups - since 4 get used at any one time, 12 should give them plenty of time for rinsing it out.... I hope... I'll be making a trip to Hong Kong later in the year so I'll probably get my teapot set there, but my FSIL got hers from T2 and I've seen very nice sets at Lupicia Fresh Tea (QV Melbourne) - I think their stuffs are imported from Japan, quite pricey.

As for the tea, my FSIL just used normal tea (a bit better in quality), but this is what I've found;

What's in the Tea
# The tea served at Chinese weddings has been the same kind for thousands of years. It's a sweet beverage with red dates and lotus seeds in it for a symbolic meaning. In Chinese the word "date" sounds the same as "early," and the word for "seed" can also refer to "child." The tea therefore symbolizes a wish for the wedding couple to have a child soon.

Read more: Chinese Tea Ceremony Wedding Traditions | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/about_6384375_chine ... z0rjk0X2I9


Hope that helps! Sorry to hijack the thread... :oops:
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Thu Jun 24, 2010 3:56 pm

Hi ninja_kwan,

Thanks for the information! :D When are you getting married?! Are you having your Australia and HK wedding just weeks apart from each other? I'm still wondering if having my second reception back in Malaysia a week after the one in Australia is too much of a rush. :?

I think it's easier to get teapot sets in Melbourne than in Brisbane. Most likely I'll get it in Malaysia when I'm still around. Is there a particular design that's a must-have for Chinese weddings?
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Thu Jun 24, 2010 4:27 pm

Hi!

The wedding date is set to be March 2011 - the HK dinner and the reception here is going to be two weeks apart... we're going on our honeymoon first before heading to HK. We're trying to keep the dinner in HK to be simple, so it's going to be more a family gathering than a wedding, still trying to figure out whether we should send out invitations with double happiness on it or just a normal dinner invitations.... any suggestions? Are you sending out Wedding invites for your Malaysia Reception?

I *think* the teapot just need to be red or gold.

This is the teapot I've set my mind on getting in HK....
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Thu Jun 24, 2010 9:25 pm

Hi there :D

That's a nice teapot! I was also thinking of the same thing. I would most likely include the second reception date on the same wedding invitation along with the Australia wedding ceremony and reception details. Do you think that's possible? Did you send out save the date cards/magnets already? I was wondering when I should send those out since I would be expecting many travelling guests from around Australia and a few from Malaysia.

Trying to have everything nice and perfect but money is always the limiting factor. By the way, are you taking any pre-wedding photographs to display during your wedding reception? :) It's quite a common thing among Asians but not in Australia.
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Thu Jun 24, 2010 11:52 pm

FH's aunt in HK is organising our tea set for us :) We will be serving normal tea I think though, although a good quality one. Will need to check with FMIL about that. :)
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Thu Jun 24, 2010 11:56 pm

Hi again!

I was going to send two sets of invites - one set for the ppl who would be attending the Melb ceremony/Reception and another set for ppl who would be attending the dinner in HK, but I like your idea of having the details of both events together. That way they can choose which one to attend (not really.. hehe). Our invitation is going to be loose card rather than the traditional folding card, so it wouldn't be too difficult to add in "another page".

I've started giving save the date card out (to the Melb Event) back in March - our wedding is going to be over the Melbourne labour day long weekend so need to get in early. 8) I was going to get save the date magnet, but they're not cheap so I used post card instead (I only posted it to people overseas and interstate, and handed it out to people locally to save on postage) :mrgreen:

I know exactly what you mean with money being a limiting factor - I just been quoted $380 for a one tier 12 cm FOAM cake! :evil: We're trying to keep the cost down so we won't be doing professional pre-wedding photos, but am considering some candid pre-wedding shoots though (probably get friends to do it).
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Fri Jun 25, 2010 12:55 am

ninja_kwan wrote:
I just been quoted $380 for a one tier 12 cm FOAM cake!


That's insane! Imagine having 3 tier one :x

By the way, I was wondering how did you guys select your wedding date? You know how some Chinese superstition says you can't get married on certain months e.g. the Hungry Ghost festival. FH and I haven't exactly picked out a date yet but we know we wanna do it in Autumn 2012, so the Hungry Ghost festival is not an issue here.

We're Catholics so we can't get married during the season of Lent which starts on Feb 22, 2012 right up till Easter Sunday on April 8, 2012. That leaves us with only very few dates to choose from if we still want an Autumn wedding. Then mum sort of casually reminded me that very few people get married in April because it's the Ching Ming festival month. I mean, personally I don't believe in these kind of superstition THAT MUCH but would prefer to avoid certain months if it has been traditionally avoided. So, is getting married at the end of April a bad idea? I thought of early May too but would rather not since winter is approaching and the daylight is gonna get shorter.
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Fri Jun 25, 2010 2:36 am

Yiikes, the auspicious date thing..... ummm that's hard. I had such a debate/argument with my family when I was setting the date. All I know is Lunar Calendar month March is a no no, July is also no no (Chinese Halloween) - lunar calendar are usually one month behind. Don't really know the others..... Wait until your parents or elders start mentioning about no wedding during their birthday month and/or the day clashing with their horoscope. My sister can't be on the bridal party or view my ceremony cause my wedding day clashes with her horoscope! insane - i know!

At the end of April should be ok though.... I just did a google search, Chinese New Year will be on 23/01 in 2012 so end of April should be the start of April in lunar calendar which mean it's no longer Ching Ming Festival!! :wink:
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Fri Jun 25, 2010 3:33 pm

ninja_kwan wrote:
My sister can't be on the bridal party or view my ceremony cause my wedding day clashes with her horoscope! insane - i know!


Oh my gosh! Does it mean that your sister can't attend your wedding at all?

OH! Is end of April really okay? How do I check it? Thing is, I don't know how to read Chinese :oops: so I don't know how to interpret the Chinese lunar calendar as well. May I know when exactly is the beginning of April according to the lunar calendar?
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Fri Jun 25, 2010 5:04 pm

Heya!

Yeah, my sister can attending, but she can't participate in the tea ceremony (she's older) or the civil ceremony (i think). I'm sure I'll find out exactly what she can or can't do closer to the day.

Just checked! Lunar Calendar April start on 21/4! You're in luck!! Happy for you! :D
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Fri Jun 25, 2010 8:40 pm

That's great news for me then! Thanks for checking :D Will keep you updated once I've decided on the date and venues :)
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Sat Jun 26, 2010 1:48 am

I am so luck that FH's family is so easy going. Dates were not an issue for us, we just picked a date which suited us and everyone was fine with that! They aren't very traditional though. I find it fascinating to discover some of the other traditions though, makes our rather small attempt look a bit pathetic in comparison really! :lol:
 
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Re: Chinese Weddings

Sat Jun 26, 2010 9:29 am

Dandelion wrote:
Dates were not an issue for us, we just picked a date which suited us and everyone was fine with that!


You're so lucky! :D Sometimes when family interferes too much, you'd start wondering whether they are the ones who are getting married. Not yourself :(
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