A Community for Brides Planning their Wedding in Australia

 
KiwiMelH
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 1:30 pm

I like the tall ones too, but fishbowls are pretty as well. I reckon your safe either way.
 
darkphoenix
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 2:11 pm

I prefer the tall ones too but fishbowls are gorgeous too. Have you tried Kmart for your vases? I've bought quite a few there for under $5.
With the candle holders, is it ones kind of like this you're looking for?
Image
They have them in at Sams warehouse for I thinkk $2, not sure if you have Sams down that way but you'd think you'd be able to get them at other reject shops. If you get really stuck though, I'm happy to get some for you, although I don't know how cheap postage would be.
 
millie
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 2:22 pm

I like the idea of the tall vase and single orchard. I think that will look nice. I have the diamond tea light holders too that you are talking about. We are not using them for table settings though, just in certain spots for decorations- eg. 3 in bathroom (ladies), three on signing table for ceremony, a few near the guest book. I kind f bought them on a whim and realised that my venue is prestty much decorated and doesn't need more anyway.

Grr to the MOH. That really annoys me. I'm petrified that one of my BMs is not going to fit in her dress- she's in a newish relationship and so has put on a bit of 'love' weight. But i think it would be too rude to ask her to try it on. Mind you, she just got engaged and so has gone 'omg I've got to lose weight' so I think she's found some motivation!!!
 
beckstar2012
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 3:23 pm

Thanks ladies. I am glad that you have all said the tall ones because after thinking about it at lunchtime I have decided to stick with the tall vases. There are so many cheap $2 shops around here that even if the one I have orded them from can't get the 12 in, I am sure I can find enough between all the stores in Canberra.

Kate these are the tealight candle holders I have already but my friend found some more of them in the reject shop for $2 each (rather than $6 each everywhere else) and although she said they arent as crystally as the ones I currently I have I think they will do the job. I asked her to pick them up for me and if I don't like them I will return them on the weekend. Fingers crossed they look OK.
 
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Balls
formerly known as JessieK
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 4:28 pm

I am getting so anxious about everything now.
 
darkphoenix
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 4:34 pm

Hugs Jessie! Going by your S&T you seem on top of everything and it all seems wonderful. I know it'll all come together wonderfully on the day for you. I know that doesn't help much now, I'm stressed big time too but it'll all work out and it'll be so worth it on the day.
 
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 4:39 pm

I just rang riot arts and crafts which is where I got my paper from and they can't garuntee it'll be in before the wedding. The best they can do is ring around a few shops to see if they have any but she said I'll have to go into the shop and pick it up myself. So potentially I could be going all over sydney to find some paper. If I hadn't already made a bunch of stuff with this paper I'd ditch it but it's too late now.
 
darkphoenix
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 4:44 pm

Do you know the name of the paper Jessie? I can check out some places up here, postage wouldn't be that much and if it helps get rid of a bit of stress.
 
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Balls
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 5:04 pm

It didn't have a name, it's just called sage scrap booking paper 12x12. I found 8 pieces at the shopping center my sister works at so hopefully I can get what I need out of that. I'll be buggered if I need more for place cards though! Thanks for the offer Kate, that's so sweet of you! I certainly wouldn't complain if you could keep an eye out!
 
darkphoenix
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 5:32 pm

Let me know if you get stuck Jessie. I just called on of my friends who works at the closest riot to me and they've got 11 pieces. She can dodgily hide them behind the counter till I can get down there :P Even though it's the closest it's still an hour away but I'm driving straight past it next Wednesday when I'm meeting my florist so I'm happy to stop in if you need it.
 
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Balls
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 6:19 pm

That would be awesome, Kate thank you!! If you PM me your bank details and tell how much you want postage I'll transfer it tonight, thanks so much!! Such a huge help :mrgreen:
 
millie
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 9:25 pm

Awww that's so sweet Kate!
I was like that with invites. And I've got VERY limited paper for placecards. I will be f$&@Ed if I have to add any more people to our place settings!
 
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 10:18 pm

Ladies I have read the past few pages of posts (you have all been busy chatting the past few days!) I am not going to comment on them all, Im a bit exausted (home from work at 9:30pm, just ate dinner at 10pm).

I wanted to come on and just get a few things off my chest....I know you will all read this without judging...

Im feeling that with 1 month to go, our relationship is nowhere near as good as it could be (and should be.... and was!)...I just feel like FH is not putting in any effort, and is just going through the motions. He is spending all his spare time on his hobbies, while I try and maintain the house, plan the wedding, and am doing most of the honeymoon planning too. We both have full time jobs. For example, today he had the day off work and I didnt. I put the washing on before I left and asked him to hang it out. He did this, but did he bring it in at all when it was dry? Nope! So I get home from work at 9:30 and its damp again... I asked him to look at accomodation in San Francisco for our honeymoon. Did he do that? Nope! I have been asking him to do some tidying up in the garden for about 2 weeks. Did he do that? Nope! (I tell him I will do it myself, but I KNOW he wants to keep certain things in the garden which I would pull out - so I leave it..)...There is washing up in the kitchen sink from last night...did he touch it all day? Nope! (still there when I got home from work)... I ring him 5 times when I was leaving work, just to ask him to turn the oven on, so I can have some dinner when I get home at 9:30... he doesnt answer. When I walk in the front door he is asleep on the lounge with an empty pizza box. ummm...pizza for me? Nope! Oven on? Nope! How bout I think of dinner for myself at 10pm then, shall I? Oh and I bring that washing in while Im waiting for my dinner to cook... I say "it's bin night tonight"...his response "Well off you go"...my face said "Excuse me??" Instead I said "Im cooking dinner" (insert the obvious bitchy tone here).... I ask what he did today (not in an accusing tone, but truely interested int he answer...) his reponse "absolutely nothing"....well yes I can see that! A kiss for me when I got home from work? Nope! Hes still asleep on the lounge, and I know he will just eventually just make his way to bed. The bins arent out and I will probably end up doing it...

I am not saying we all dont deserve a day of 'nothing'....we all love that every now and then...but today is just the examples I have given you. I have been feeling this way for awhile...

I feel like crying , going for a long walk, and I really feel like a cuddle....



Is this normal, are we both reacting to stress in different ways? He has never been so inconsiderate, and I am never so annoyed with him. I feel like if I bring this up, I sound like Im nagging. They all sound like silly things that I am complaining about, but I just feel so unloved at the moment...
 
Majeen
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 10:30 pm

Big hugs Hawaiian :e_hug:

You will probably feel better if you have a good cry to start with. My FH does all of the above also even after I have asked him x amounts a day for the last 4 years we have lived together. They never learn and always forget no matter how many times you tell him. Males are generally inconsiderate and just don't think things through.

I think you need to have a open honest talk with FH with no tv on or any other distractions and explain how his actions or lack thereof are making you feel and that you are second guessing your future together. Communication is key in a relationship, we all know this but often forget it when it is our relationshiop as we don't want to create complications or drama.

You need to get it off your chest. If he pulls his socks up after your chat, you know he is your man. I know my man can't stand to see me cry and knows I must be really upset as I am not a crier generally so if that will help your cause make sure you use it.

If men did things the first time we wouldn't have to nag!

Don't forget that you are under a lot of stress and will probably be at a low and he isn't helping and things may seem worse than they are becauser every little thing turns into one big thing and snowballs.

I hope things get better for you sweetie.
 
darkphoenix
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 10:50 pm

Erin, I think a bit of that is just men. I end up having to do so much myself because FH won't get off his ***. I have to remind him that I work long hours (albeit not full-time but the days I'm there it's close to 10hrs) and that I'm sick and it still takes a bit of nagging. I think just sit down and talk to him, explain how you're feeling and that you need his help especially with the long hours and the wedding planning stress. I'm forever being told men don't do subtle so maybe your FH just doesn't see it.
Maybe ask him how's he's feeling? He might be a bit overwhelmed by all the wedding stuff, or secretly just as stressed as you and maybe that's why he's acting up.
Big hugs to you, I hope things pick up soon.
 
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 10:59 pm

Thanks guys...Yes I will bring it up (when he isn't asleep), but I just needed to vent tonight. Yes I agree, boys can be boys sometimes, and they just dont get it.. There is a definate change in him lately though...im thinking he is stressed too, and this is how he shows it.
 
darkphoenix
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Re: March 2012

Mon Feb 06, 2012 11:17 pm

Vent away, there's always plenty of us girls here to listen.

It could well just be his reaction, if you haven't had any big stresses before it could be a side you haven't seen. I learnt that FH pretty much just shuts off when he's stressed. I honestly thought he was going to walk away from the relationship when we first found out about my health, he was just that distant and uninterested I thought he didn't care and was trying to find a way to walk away without seeming like a complete jerk.

I think if you have time, spoil yourself a little, run a nice bath and pour a glass of wine and just relax for a night. Always helps me :)
 
KiwiMelH
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Re: March 2012

Tue Feb 07, 2012 8:12 am

I agree Erin vent away thats what we are here for. My FH was exactly the same and when I talked to him about it he just honestly said that it slips his mind he doesnt intentionaly not do these things. So we put up a whiteboard and on that is FH's list of things to do. I let him do them in his own time but the things on the list do get done.

After a while doing his chores lol has become second nature and he usually will call me on the morning of the first two days of his days off (he has four) to see if anything needs doing. The second two days I leave him to his own devices to do as he pleases, this way we are both happy.

on my weekends I have one day of doing my chores and a day of relaxing. The only thing he ever asks me to do when he is working in the weekend is bring him lunch (all he thinks abuot is food)

it will work out and dont worry I do think its just the stress of the wedding or what my FH likes to call, the clearing the air period before the wedding where you voice all the little things that worry you about your relationship out. Nothing like the thought of being together forever to make you realise the things that you would like to sort out before hand.
 
millie
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Re: March 2012

Tue Feb 07, 2012 8:18 am

Big hugs.

Yep we all feel this way sometimes. And I think it is a combo of being a man and being stressed. The garbage thing though- that would have tipped me over the edge. And the not answering the phone. I hate when guys do that. My FH is big on his hobbies too so I know what you mean. He also has the annoying habbit that he LOVES hanging out at his mum's house (the dog is there and there is always sport on tv) so will often go and do all her gardening, mow the lawn, whipper snipper the works and do nothing around our house!

However I would have a big long chat with him and let him know how you feel. Tell him you're not planning on getting into a marriage where you just 'go through the motions'.

Oh and also, I hate the idea that just because you are about to be married that you can't let your feelings about your relationship be known. Everyone goes through ups and downs and good days and bad.

good luck
 
darkphoenix
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Re: March 2012

Tue Feb 07, 2012 9:27 am

I keep having wedding nightmares! I keep thinking I'm not that stressed but obviously all these little things are playing on my mind. The one last night, I woke up to remember I had a song list but hadn't downloaded any of the songs! So instead of getting my hair and makeup done I spent the morning downloading music, so when I was finally getting into my dress I looked like I'd just woken up. Then it was helping the girls into their dresses and MOH (despite having a new one) didn't fit into hers. And it had been raining so the dirt road to the chapel was horrible and our car got bogged so we had to get out and walk and my dress was brown by the time we got the chapel an hour late! Absolutely ridiculous I know! The car one has been playing on my mind slightly, the roads meant to be sealed before March but all the rain probably will have delayed it and the vintage car we've hired won't go down on a dirt road, he only agreed because council said it would be sealed in January. Just wish there was an easy way to flick off the stress button, even talking to FH doesn't help. He just tells me I'm being a girl and it'll all work out, helpful huh?
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