A Community for Brides Planning their Wedding in Australia

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darkphoenix
I survived and got married
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 9:43 am

Definitely agree Erin, it really depends on the person.
I think all this baby talk has gotten to me though, had the strangest dreams about it last night! Was out shopping with some girlfriends and felt nauseous all of a sudden and we deduced I must have been pregnant. Great logic but then I had to try and hide it from everyone because the wedding was 3 weeks away but come the wedding I looked almost ready to pop!!! Ridiculous!

I sat down and went through our budget again this morning and it's looking good! We're $200 short with what we have saved at the moment so I figure if we can't save that in 5 weeks there's something wrong. Best thing though, we haven't had to touch our house deposit/baby money. Still coming back to the kid thing, we've been putting away $80 a week towards IVF and hormone treatments, they're expensive and not sure if we'll need to go down that path. I haven't had my normal cycle since I got sick so not sure if that will rectify when I'm better but at least we're prepared and we've got a house deposit if we don't have to go down that path.

I just realized we still haven't got our toasting glasses! We haven't found anything in the shops but I don't know if there's enough time to order anything online. But I guess we'll see! Serves me right for leaving everything last minute.
 
reen
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 9:58 am

Hello ladies!! I have been having wierd dreams too...I had one where I had to where the toilet paperdress from my hens day because my real dress didn't arrive in time!!! Hilarious now but mini freakout when I woke up ha ha!

Finally got to see and try on my dress on wed! Was so exciting! They only have to tighten across the boobs a bit and put a bustle in otherwise it was perfect!! I hadnt seen it for so long (near 8 months) and it is beautiful. It is strapless and I was going to put straps on it but I have decided to wear a lace bolero instead which looked really nice. I'm pretty broad across the shoulders and the straps kind of looked a bit tacky. But the bolero is beutiful.

Only 22 days for me woo! Had a major meltdown last night...I think I was overtired but i started stressing about walking down th aisle in front of everone. And my dad isn't very well at the moment so I think all stress just kindof came out at once!! But woke up feeling much more postiive this morning...maybe I just needed a good cry ha ha!

Kate I hope your treatments in that week go well :D

Love hearing all your news girls.

Reen
 
KiwiMelH
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 10:30 am

I so have extreme baby brain!! Its all I think about.

Reen dont you just love it when your dress is finally good to go, once my last fitting was done I just felt so good. And everyday that we get closer I get more and more excited.

Olny four more days of work after this....thank god. Im getting really over it.
 
darkphoenix
I survived and got married
I survived and got married
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 11:07 am

Reen, that's exciting! It's such a good feeling hey!

I have no idea why but my ticker was saying I still had 5 months to go!!! Silly thing! I'm too excited about it being so soon that I don't want to wait that long!
 
Brys
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 11:14 am

march is next week!!!! eek!

5 weeks tomorrow Kate - OH MY!

finished our marriage preparation course last night. thoroughly enjoyed it. it was a really nice experience and we had a lot of laughs. we scored really high on our questionnaire results and our facilitator was impressed about how open we are and how much we discuss...im a therapist afterall. poor FH is forced to discuss everything!! although we already feel very confortable about our choice to get married it was nice to hear it from someone who doesnt know us.

so invites are posted and RSVPs slowly trickling in. meeting with our graphic designer to finalise our OOS, menus, seating plans and place cards tomorrow.

priest has lodged all the 'official' paperwork.

dress fitting last wednesday. was distressing to watch her cut my dress in front of me. bought my shoes (in love)

menu tasting done and entrees, mains and wine chosen.

rings on order and ceremony written.

looks like we are ready to get married!
 
darkphoenix
I survived and got married
I survived and got married
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 11:23 am

Brys! I've been wondering how you've been going. I'm feeling a touch unorganized compared to the other girls but then I keep remembering I still have over a month and most of theirs are a matter of weeks. Do you have much left to do? I'm feeling fairly on top of things but it's less then a week till there's under a month to go!
 
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Hawaiian Wedding
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 11:39 am

Reen and Kate they are bizarre dreams! Haha gosh our heads are playing games with us :-)

Kate you have done so well with the budget! We didn't really have a budget, just didn't want to spend a ridiculous amount. I think we have done well enough, some bargains here and there even out the other things :P

Kate I think you can get some toasting flutes online in time if they are in Australia.. Maybe not overseas though..

Just one more thing on the TTC topic, I guess we are starting in July... Just starting my box of the pill which will go for four months :D

Brys you sound very organized and also very excited !!!

I had my ering cleaned today... My god it makes a difference!! So sparkly!
 
beckstar2012
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 12:27 pm

Hawaiian Wedding wrote:
I had my ering cleaned today... My god it makes a difference!! So sparkly!


OMG Erin thank you for reminding me! I need to get my ering re-plated before the wedding (stupid white gold!) and I just called them to find out when I need to take it in and lucky I did because I need to have it to them by Sunday or I would have missed out until after the wedding. I could have taken it to another jeweller but know and trust this one.
 
darkphoenix
I survived and got married
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 12:49 pm

I've got to get mine done too! I keep putting it off, they've said they only need 10 days (the prongs need to be re-dipped) but thinking I might drop it in sooner then that, better safe then sorry although I'll be worried about wearing it before the wedding once its cleaned!

Funny thing, I know we had to cut so many corners, I'd still do it the same way if I could do it again. It'd be nice knowing there's extra money there if we needed it but I'd still be doing everything myself and keeping costs down. I've had loads of fun making all the things, I think the only difference is we definitely would have been adding a lolly buffet, I probably would have bitten the bullet and gone with a local florist for flowers (an extra $300 on what we're paying but there's no stress of how to get them here) and there's probably another 10 or so people we would have loved to have invited. But I figure I'll get a second and third chance with all the wedding planning with my brother and sister, they're both adamant I'm being their wedding planner :P
 
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Hawaiian Wedding
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 2:50 pm

Haha happy to have reminded you about your ring Beckstar, and glad you made the phone call today!
 
darkphoenix
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I survived and got married
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 6:25 pm

I'm so over it at the moment! Having more dramas with my MOH! Just really want to ask her to step down! Ask for the dress back and swap it over for FSILs size! MOH has let me know today that if there's less then 10 people for the hens night it's still a flat rate of $380! Not once has that been mentioned before and it's looking like there'll only be 8 of us which is almost $50pp plus drinks and dinner! That's ridiculously expensive and I would have said we'll figure out something else. She's also told me that I have to chase everyone up to find out if they're coming (as if I don't have enough to do) and that I'll be paying for myself, not that I mind but from the get go she'd told me I'd be covered for the night as she had a free voucher for the hen (turns out that was only if there was 20people and I only gave her 12 on the invite list!). The few people I've called have outright said they can't afford the extra so it's cut the numbers down to 5 which would mean $76pp, not happening!!! So it's now looking like it'll have to be cancelled! Mum and my sister wouldn't let me go without but I don't know what they'd be able to slap together in such a short time.

The thing that's really getting to me, and I don't know if I'm overreacting here, is MOH mentioned she bought a new laptop today (not on interest free or credit, I checked) even though there's no problem with her old one other then her DS has scrawled a little bit on the top of it (so doesn't affect how it's running) and then in practically the same breath told me she wasn't sure when she'd have the money for the dress or if she'd be able to afford her hair and makeup! If she can afford $800 for a new bloody laptop she obviously could have afforded the $250 for the dress and the hair and makeup she's insisting on having done.

I just wish there was a way around it, I'm just so tired of the stress at the moment.
 
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Balls
formerly known as JessieK
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 6:32 pm

What a PITA, Kate! I'm honestly so sick of everyone's crap that we all seem to get! I would tell her you're very sorry to hear she's having financial troubles and that if she can't afford it then you guess she'll just have to be a guest at the wedding as you can't afford to pay for her.
 
darkphoenix
I survived and got married
I survived and got married
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Joined: Fri Aug 05, 2011 12:45 am

Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 6:42 pm

I like to think I haven't been just focused on the wedding so I don't feel like I'm being a bridezilla with her but it really has just gotten to the last straw. I've told her if she can't afford it I'm ok if she just comes as a guest but no, apparently it's fine and I might just have to pay on the day and she'll pay me back when she has the chance! The whole point is I can't afford to pay for you this side of the wedding whether you pay me back or not. She's also set aside about $300 just for her drinks for the hens night so obviously money isn't that tight! I've tried bringing it up with her and subtle just isn't working!
 
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Balls
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 6:54 pm

Be firm! Tell her you're very sorry but if she can't afford it, you haven't actually got the spare cash laying around to cover her. Start telling her about all of YOUR financial problems! I think people think think if you're planning a wedding you've got loads of spare cash laying around which is weird!
 
darkphoenix
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 7:40 pm

My god! Worst phone call ever! Just spend a good 20min on the phone to MOH. She kept insisting that I could just pay on the day and that she hoped she had the money. I've told her I need to know in two weeks whether she definitely has the money or not, played up that we still have to find $400 for the wedding so I don't have any extra lying round to pay for her so if she can't afford it I'll take her dress back and swap it for FSILs size. Up until now I don't think she thought I had a backup or that I'd follow through with it. Told her I really wanted her as part of the bridal party but I can't afford to pick up the slack so she has a couple of weeks to figure it out. I feel so horrible but it had to be said otherwise I would have been stressing big time.
My hens night is still a mess though so I'm spending the weekend reorganizing it. Said to MOH we'd need to rethink it and she suggested just going back to a pub crawl. Not happening and told her if she was insistent on organizing it, I wouldn't be coming. So now looking like dinner at a Mexican restaurant (with margaritas :P) followed by bowling, there's an actual bowling bar in the city and for hens partys everyone gets a cocktail plus there's a private room for karaoke. Hopefully it'll still be fun.
 
KiwiMelH
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 8:18 pm

I'm so proud that you told her the truth Kate. From what I know about you I feel like you are a kind an generous person and people like to take advantage of that unfortunately. Asfor you hens I think it's perfect for you to do considering you can really drink much and it sounds like heaps of fun.

I had my first ever weddjng breakdown cry today. I haven't told you guys but last week out of the blue my auntie says thy she's has booked her flights and is coming to the wedding. Two weeks out and the RSVP date was 1st dec. I had alreay made my placecards and all my table charts. She then asks if she can sleep on the couch of the rooms where I have booked for everyone. I said yes cause in my family that's what you do but also told her she would have to pay the same amount 200 for an entire weeks accomm because nick and I have paid half of everyone's accommcost in this place.

Two days later after I reprinted everything I get a message saying another auntie is coming. She's my dads second cousin and wasn't invited, but has booked her flights so what am I supposed to say. Then wait for a second and realise, wait, where is she staying to which j get asked the same whether she can stay at the houses too. So j now have a fully packed house and a room that should have only had 2 now has 4 in it. But the worst thing is that FH has extended family there aswell who we couldn't offer accom to and when they find out they are going to be pissed!!

So that's the pre story.

Today two weeks in my aunties gets the food order to give to me for my
Other cousins and uncle who RSVP on time. But there is an extra person on it. Turns out they invited one of my cousins and just never told me about it at all!

I am so $(@;Ed off with them thinking its simple to add another person but it's not each person coatis x amount of money that we didn't budget for so has to come out of our honeymoon spending money. I also have to rearrange all of my table seating as there is now one too many people on my dads side of the family table. It was the final straw and when icame to home and saw FH I just started bawling.

FH told me I should make them aware of all the extra work I have to do, but I'm not. I don't want it to beawkward. What I did say is that I need to make sure that this is all that is coming by tomorrow morning as I am confirming with the restaurant and have to give final numbers.

Oh mi that was huge sorry ladies I just needed to b!tch to someone.
 
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Balls
formerly known as JessieK
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 8:33 pm

Awww Mellybean that is so frustrating for you! From what you've said there's not alot you can do so I'm not going to offer advice, just GBHs! Have a great big glass of wine and have a break from thinking about it for a little bit xx
 
reen
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 8:43 pm

Oh Mel that sounds terrible! if they didnt recieve an invite why would they assume they should come? very strange and frustrating for you!!

Kate: My hens day was organised by my bridesmaids (my two older sisters and friend). There were about 25 girls that came.It was a "Cocktail Pool Party" We held it at my FIL's who have a pool and outdoor deck area. Each person paid $30 and we had coctails and mocktails, lots of yummy food made by my sister and played games like toilet paper wedding dress, peg game, "pin the willy on the hunk" ha ha and other silly games. That went from 2.30 until 6 then whoever was interested came out to the local pub for tea. We sepearted the arvo so it was more affordable for people. But for only 10 or 12 people you could definitely do an arvo like this for $15 or $20 I reckon!! Something to think about anyway!
 
darkphoenix
I survived and got married
I survived and got married
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Joined: Fri Aug 05, 2011 12:45 am

Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 9:23 pm

Big hugs Mel! It's a bit rude of them but it's so hard to say anything when it's family. There's not a whole lot I can suggest that wouldn't make things awkward but you know we're all here if you need to vent.

Thanks Reen. I've been looking into things we could do at home, it would mean kicking my brother out of his house as his is the only one big enough but he'll live. Only problem is MOH is so unorganized that she wouldn't organize anything else in such a short time. It took her 2 and a half months to send out the invites after we decided on a date and what we were doing (which left everyone with just 3 weeks to decide if they were coming or not!) so I want something where I don't have to do a lot of organizing, just a phone call or two to book and telling everyone where to show up. I could probably organize a decent home event but just not wanting to take on another thing right a the moment.
 
millie
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Re: March 2012 - Part 2

Fri Feb 24, 2012 10:57 pm

Mel and Kate OMG

I don't even know where to begin.

Ok, I do... Kate, you MOH sounds like a selfish cow. sorry to say. she just is such a friggin pain that I want to call her up and tell her to grow the f up. You have told her that you don't want a big massive party drinkfest for your hens. And she's put aside $300? wtf? all she seems to do is whinge and moan and complain about everything and act as though it is her day. IT IS NOT HER DAY. Tell her no hair and makeup. Just tell her it's cancelled. It is outragous for her to tell you that she 'might' be able to afford it. she is jealous of you getting married (so sorry to say that, i usually hate when people say someone is jealous of someone getting married) but she is. Cut her out and do it now before she ruins your day.

Mel- It is just not ok for people to invite themselves to a wedding!!!!! that is the craziest thing I've ever ever ever heard. I just think you should call the cousin and say, they weren't invited, you can't afford it, they are welcome to the ceremony but not the reception. end of story.

i'm being such a ***** today but I'm fed up with these people!!!!

All good in my corner, it's Friday!!!

Oh, so cute, my kids in class today were talking about the wedding (ok, I was talking about the wedding, but in a very legit way- we were talking about why we measure things and brainstorming all the things we measure and I told them about how I had to be measured for my wedding dress and we talked about why- they had some very funny consequences for if the dress didn't fit which included my dress falling off during the kiss and me falling flat on my face when I tripped over my dress if it was too long!) anyway one of them said, 'where is it, I want to come' and I said, 'oooh, I don't think you can' and they said, 'fine but you better video it so we can all watch it back at school. So I haven't organised a videographer but now I dotatlly want to so the kids can see it!!!
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