A Community for Brides Planning their Wedding in Australia

 
Illikaeri
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Re: Making friends over 30

Mon Oct 08, 2012 9:59 pm

I'm 23 and I have no real friends of my own. I've never been outwardly sociable, I don't drink, I don't go out clubbing or partying. Anyone I know face-to-face in this age bracket, drinking and clubbing is all they want to do. Anyone who I previously did consider somewhat of a friend has since popped out a child, and as I have no children of my own yet, I have pretty much been shunned.

Depresses me really.
 
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stormageddon
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Re: Making friends over 30

Tue Oct 09, 2012 9:24 am

I think everyone can relate to this story in some way, I have actually been trying to get myself out of this 'friend slum' of late by trying to talk to more people and taking a leap of faith and inviting newly met people out for coffee or drinks....

This worked wonders last year and I made such a great new friend she is now my MOH ;)
 
misteri82
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Re: Making friends over 30

Thu Oct 11, 2012 11:35 am

Illikaeri wrote:
I've never been outwardly sociable, I don't drink, I don't go out clubbing or partying. Anyone I know face-to-face in this age bracket, drinking and clubbing is all they want to do.


I found this as well. Also I went to uni late and so I was 25 and my friends were 19 and they just wanted to go out, but I just wanted to go to dinner, hang out with FH, or play video games (I also had a video game addiction/commitment that took up a lot of time).

I'm actually making more friends now that I am volunteering at my local dog club. Dog people are good people : )
 
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MoolieMoo
I survived and got married
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Re: Making friends over 30

Fri Oct 12, 2012 9:09 pm

This is such a common theme these days - people are noticing it more because they have hundreds of facebook 'friends' but spend every night and weekend alone.

It was my New Years resolution to find a new best friend after my old bestie (of 10 years) dumped me. :(

Well, it hasn't happened yet, I have written a blog about my adventures this year actually on My Calorie Pal.

I've met **** loads of people this year, have gone to heaps of dinners, joined and started clubs, invited people out and finally read 'The Secret' (which is what I believe will help me in the end)

The main issue I've found is that people are just plain LAZY, relationships are HARD WORK and they're SCARY.

So people quit before they start.
 
sidonie
Little Miss Pearl
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Re: Making friends over 30

Fri Oct 12, 2012 11:04 pm

And if anyone can do it MonsoonPrincess it's you. You're one of the warmest people i've come across in a while :)
 
sidonie
Little Miss Pearl
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Re: Making friends over 30

Sat Oct 13, 2012 4:00 pm

Who fests would be awesome! Have you seen the little 5 min thing they did this week to tie up a few threads with Brian Pond?
 
sidonie
Little Miss Pearl
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Re: Making friends over 30

Sun Oct 14, 2012 9:13 am

ETA: Did you notice that Brian is Arthur Weasley?!

YES!!!! :D

Oh and Ashling I do the dinner party with a random mashup of people too. It works really well!
 
gdemon
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Re: Making friends over 30

Sun Oct 14, 2012 3:34 pm

So many of my good friends have moved interstate/overseas the past few years, and my family is all overseas. If it wasn't for DH I'd be really lonely.

I find it hard to make friends since most colleagues are at least 15 years older (they talk about their children's schools and mortgages), and fellow students are 5+ years younger (they talk about big nights out and student life). I don't fit into either demographic. :( So now I'm focusing building closer relationships with our relatives - DH's grandparents and aunts/uncles who live close by, and my second cousins who live 3.5 hours away.
 
snoopkat
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Re: Making friends over 30

Mon Jan 14, 2013 1:45 pm

Can't believe I missed this thread!

I've been trying to get out of my friend funk zone for a couple of months now. I grew up overseas so have left all my childhood friends behind. I've got a couple of close girlfriends here and while i've always loved catching up with them, I find that we generally end up talking about the same things over and over. Every girly lunch/drinks turns into Groundhog Day...

Late last year, I've discovered Meetup (apparently it's been around for awhile but I'm slow like that) and I've starte joining a couple of groups (girls only though) and I've gone to 2 meetups so far. So far, I've met 2 girls that live relatively close to me and they seem pretty fun to hang out with. Going to another meetup dinner this Sat and hopefully meet more new people that way. My aim this year is to try and go to at least 1 meetup a month and see what happens.

I'm not the most vivacious person nor will I ever be the life and soul of the party, but I figured if I don't push myself out of my comfort zone and make new friends, nobody's going to do it for me. I've got nothing to lose and if it doesn't pan out the way I want it to, I could always have a cry about it on vent vault :P
 
snoopkat
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Re: Making friends over 30

Tue Jan 15, 2013 2:09 pm

We're putting the Melb move on the back burner for now :( We looked at housing prices in Melb and even though it's technically cheaper to buy there, I will most likely have to take a massive pay cut which would price us out of houses and we'll only be able to afford an apartment. So that puts us back to square one and defeats the purpose of moving since we already have our own apartment here in Syd. Any chance you can move up to Syd? :P

When I was in my 20s, everything was a big deal, everything was a drama. It would be the end of the world if I didn't have 10 best friends to go out with on a Sat night. If FB had been around when I was in my 20s, I'd be devastated if I didn't get a friend request every week and at least 20 likes for my FB status updates. I put up that photo 2 mins ago, why hasn't anyone commented yet?? Why hasn't anyone liked it yet?? OMG I HAVE NO FRIENDS!!!!! :e_boohoo:

The day I turned 30, something clicked and I started adopting a c'est la vie attitude. I still care what close friends and family think, but it's too much of an effort to care about what acquaintances think so I don't bother anymore. It's still a little daunting for me to go to meetups, but not as daunting as it used to be and if it doesn't work out, then it's no big deal. There are always new people to meet, new friendships to be formed.

I read somewhere that the best friend you can ever have is yourself. Once you are your own best friend (and I mean truly your own best friend in the sense that you will take care of yourself in a way no one else can/will), once you are comfortable in your own skin then it becomes easier to form friendships with other people.

p/s MP if you're referring to the same email you sent me, I don't understand why they would get upset? I thought it was lovely!
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