A Community for Brides Planning their Wedding in Australia

 
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h_kate21
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Children at Weddings

Wed Mar 06, 2013 5:02 pm

I'm getting married early next year, its going to be a bit of a laid back wedding in the backyard. However i'm not to keen on inviting all the children that are attached to our guests. This would bring our numbers up to about 140 (with about 30 of those being kids, with only 6 of them being related to me). My MOH has 3 kids of her own, and they are like my little family, i do everything with them, and they are really the only kids i would really want at our wedding. I'm trying to work out how i can involve them in the wedding ceremony, so that other people don't get upset about their kids not being invited. Eldest boy is going to be 10, youngest boy will be 5 and the girl will be 8. Can anyone give me any ideas on how to involve them? I know the 2 eldest are probably a little bit too old to be page boys and flower girls......so i'm getting stuck on how to involve them in the wedding. Please help!!!!
 
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Wand33
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Re: Children at Weddings

Wed Mar 06, 2013 5:35 pm

I dont think I can be much help cos I'm of the mind if you dont want to invite kids, then ALL kids should not be invited. Not just some.

But do whatever works for you, I'm sure someone will have some advice here
 
claireadam
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Re: Children at Weddings

Wed Mar 06, 2013 6:27 pm

Our flower girls range from 7-11 and our page boys are 8 and 9
 
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KG'sGirl
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Re: Children at Weddings

Wed Mar 06, 2013 8:31 pm

Wand33 wrote:
I dont think I can be much help cos I'm of the mind if you dont want to invite kids, then ALL kids should not be invited. Not just some.


I tend to agree, however I dont think the ages of the children are out of the realms of having them as flower girl and page boy.

This topic has been done a few times and can get a little heated, however if you arent going to invite children attached to guests be prepared for them not to attend your wedding.
 
seaweed
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Re: Children at Weddings

Thu Mar 07, 2013 12:27 am

The 10 yr old boy could be a junior groomsman or an usher. But the other 2 could easily be flowergirls. Come to think of it, I don't think that the 10yr old would be too old to be a ring bearer (not a page boy).
 
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Re: Children at Weddings

Thu Mar 07, 2013 3:24 pm

I know where you're coming from h-kate. There are children I would like to have at my wedding and others that well are just a bit bratty to be honest. I know it sounds unfair, but lets face it, some kids are great to be around and some aren't. We have said no kids, however we have one that we wanted there handing out bubbles to guests and being an usher of sorts and the other two we have just said that our kids could pick one friend each they wanted to invite. If you don't feel you want these kids as pageboys or flower girls, you could try the usher thing, or just say on the day that their parents baby sitter fell through and hope they'll go along with a little white lie.
 
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Re: Children at Weddings

Fri Mar 08, 2013 10:39 am

I like the idea of referring to the 10 year old boy as 'ring bearer' rather than page boy and as the others have said the girls could be flower girls

Or you could have them in your procession between yourself the the bridesmaids and one could each carry a sign 'here' 'comes' 'the bride' and then you walk up

I've seen that before, in laidback weddings it's quite cute!
 
MrsPtoB
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Re: Children at Weddings

Fri Mar 08, 2013 1:25 pm

interested in this topic at the moment, i'm not sure about children either.
i have a lot of friends with children, and my own daughter will be a flower girl and i suppose my son will be there too but too young to do anything useful :lol:
i think friends would understand if you said no children i think mine would any way, but then i think but if they turn up and my children are there, that's a bit off isn't it?? my daughter would only be there for the ceremony then her dad would take her. but my son would stay because i don't have any one for him to go to as they are all at the wedidng!
it's definitely a tough one! i can understand both sides.
for me if i was invited to a wedding that said kids welcome, i would probably find a baby sitter any way so id idn't have to tend to their needs all the time! children are demanding and i like to go nice places with out them ;) i'd be appreciative of having an excuse to go out with out them lol
 
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Wand33
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Re: Children at Weddings

Fri Mar 08, 2013 10:29 pm

MrsPtoB wrote:
interested in this topic at the moment, i'm not sure about children either.
i have a lot of friends with children, and my own daughter will be a flower girl and i suppose my son will be there too but too young to do anything useful :lol:
i think friends would understand if you said no children i think mine would any way, but then i think but if they turn up and my children are there, that's a bit off isn't it?? my daughter would only be there for the ceremony then her dad would take her. but my son would stay because i don't have any one for him to go to as they are all at the wedidng!
it's definitely a tough one! i can understand both sides.
for me if i was invited to a wedding that said kids welcome, i would probably find a baby sitter any way so id idn't have to tend to their needs all the time! children are demanding and i like to go nice places with out them ;) i'd be appreciative of having an excuse to go out with out them lol


No i think if its your own children, people have to understand you want your own kids at your wedding. I would never begrudge someone having their own children in their wedding.
 
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Re: Children at Weddings

Sat Mar 09, 2013 12:53 pm

we are the opposite and having about 7 kids at the wedding but then all our guests are flying in from interstate.

our grandchildren are a bit too little to be involved in the ceremony, but we have suggested (and only if the little ones are up to it on the day) for them to walk down in front of me just on the path only (which is only a short distance).

I suggested this after deciding that my two great nieces and my great nephew would be involved in the wedding, the girls are both 5 the great nephew is 7. I am getting on of the girls to hand out the bubbles, one to hand out the tears of joy tissues and my nephew will be doing the ceremony programs.

they are all excited about it and I am looking forward to seeing them all involved even if its only in a small way.
 
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Re: Children at Weddings

Wed Mar 13, 2013 12:59 pm

yes i agree, either all or none [plus your own]. i would also be ok with chilidren from over seas or interstate if they really couldn't leave them behind, and also breastfed babies.
 
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Re: Children at Weddings

Wed Mar 13, 2013 1:45 pm

My maid of honour decided to bring her son to the wedding without even telling me. Then again, she had to fly from Singapore to attend my wedding so I couldn't very well turn around and tell her no kids.
 
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Re: Children at Weddings

Thu Mar 14, 2013 5:08 pm

We're having kids at our wedding- they make part of FH's (very large) family, I can't imagine it without them there. Mind you, it might save us a fortune!
The DJ we're going to book is pretty awesome - he says that if during meal times or quiet times, he notices that they're going insane, he will put on a DVD for them to watch so the adults can eat in peace. I think that's an amazing idea:)

I think if you're not going to have kids, you need a blanet rule apart from your own- no kids means no kids.
 
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Re: Children at Weddings

Thu Mar 14, 2013 7:27 pm

We invited no kids for the reason that our venue was quite small and didn't have room for the 16 or so extra seats for the kids. However 3 of our friends asked us if they could bring one child and we let them of course, they were traveling from interstate and had nobody to look after them.
 
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Re: Children at Weddings

Wed Apr 03, 2013 4:16 am

This is such a funny subject isn't it? So many opinions on both sides. I can remember at my 1st wedding, this being such a big argument between my aunt & uncle and us. In the end, I had the daughter (who was the bone of contention) as a flowergirl. It was so hard to compramise as I felt forced to include her. It all turned out in the end though.
 
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nickncarolyn1
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Re: Children at Weddings

Thu Apr 04, 2013 12:16 pm

I think, if you want them there invite them, if not, then don't.

We invited our nieces & nephews to our wedding (20 all together), but no other children. I didn't have anyone complain that their child wasn't invited. I did have one person who couldn't come because she couldn't get a babysitter, but she didn't complain. Most people were happy to have a night out without the kids!
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