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Miss Michelle
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Vows / Readings

Thu Sep 13, 2012 10:18 am

Hi ladies,

I am just after some suggestions for the vows and we would also like to have maybe two readings from friends. I always thought this part would be easy but I am finding it a bit overwhelming! We are being married by a celebrant and she said we can pretty much say whatever we like as long as she includes "X-Y-Z" for legal reasons. She sent through a few examples and I found myself just picking from there - am I just being lazy?! The vows are extremely important, I think I just have so many other things to try and organise at the moment that I am taking the easy road out. I don't want to regret it down the track though! I think our vows and the readings should be personal and meaningful to us.

What is everyone else doing? Any ideas would be greatly appreciated, thank you :heart:
 
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Re: Vows / Readings

Thu Sep 13, 2012 10:58 am

I picked mine from the book. Personalisation wasn't important to me.
 
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L.I.W
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Re: Vows / Readings

Thu Sep 13, 2012 11:09 am

Our celebrant also had a book - he called it the chinese menu! We simply said we will have a number 2, 17 and 65 (for example).

I don't think its lazy, you are still reading and choosing from a wider range, they still mean something to you and there is nothing in the rule book that says you have to write or find your own vows. If they mean something to you, even if they are not completely unique that is still personal because you chose them for your wedding.
 
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Miss Michelle
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Re: Vows / Readings

Thu Sep 13, 2012 11:13 am

L.I.W wrote:
Our celebrant also had a book - he called it the chinese menu! We simply said we will have a number 2, 17 and 65 (for example).

I don't think its lazy, you are still reading and choosing from a wider range, they still mean something to you and there is nothing in the rule book that says you have to write or find your own vows. If they mean something to you, even if they are not completely unique that is still personal because you chose them for your wedding.

The Chinese menu - I love it!

Thank you, that is a fantastic point, as long as they mean something to us that is all that matters. :heart:
 
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Re: Vows / Readings

Thu Sep 13, 2012 1:17 pm

Our celebrant sent us some examples and I also got some off the net.
I then pulled bits that I liked out of multiple examples and put them together to make them mean something for me. My FH did the same.

When I read the vows I have put together they give me goosebumps I can't wait to say them and I can't wait to hear what FH has said. We are keeping them a secret.

Its definitely not lazy they mean so much to me and express how I feel.
 
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Re: Vows / Readings

Thu Sep 13, 2012 1:50 pm

L.I.W wrote:
Our celebrant also had a book - he called it the chinese menu! We simply said we will have a number 2, 17 and 65 (for example).

I don't think its lazy, you are still reading and choosing from a wider range, they still mean something to you and there is nothing in the rule book that says you have to write or find your own vows. If they mean something to you, even if they are not completely unique that is still personal because you chose them for your wedding.

same celebrant as LIW :) we just tweaked ours a little bit
 
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Re: Vows / Readings

Thu Sep 13, 2012 6:44 pm

we arent going to write our vows, just use some that are already available from the celebrant, ones that have meanings to us.

I did a reading at my nieces wedding, it was about the wedding rings, and it meant alot to them both and its not a religious one as they knew thats not something I was comfortable with, will try to find it if you like
 
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Miss Michelle
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Re: Vows / Readings

Tue Sep 18, 2012 2:33 pm

JerseyRose wrote:
Hi Miss Michelle,

I just posted this on another topic as celebrants were brought up but here is my opinion again for you :)

So we had a meeting with our celebrant about 2 weeks ago. He had a display folder with around 15 ceremonies/vows for us to look through. He showed me the shortest ceremony (around 30minutes) and said that was the most popular. I was a little overwhelmed because there was so many, they all seemed pretty similar and to be quite honest I am more than happy for a 30minute ceremony, so I just decided to go with the one he said was most popular.. (and my fiance isn't much help, his is so easy going that he happily lets me choose everything lol). I asked for a copy of the ceremony and then went home and read over it a few times. It was a nice ceremony, don't get me wrong, but the thought of having the exact same ceremony and vows as every other wedding my celebrant does kind of got to me. I wanted to be a little different and thought do the vows he gave to me really express our relationship? I want a ceremony that reflects us and these are our vows so I really wanted it to be special to us. So over the next couple of days I did some research on the net and I took some parts from a few different ceremonies that I thought better reflected our relationship, and words that actually meant something to me. I read it out to my fiance and he was supportive as usual - he says as long as I'm happy he's happy.. but I secretly think if he doesn't have to do anything he's all for it lol. So now I'm really excited and I know that our vows and promises that we make to each other on our wedding day are going to be special to us! Moral of the story - when you pick your ceremony and vows don't be pressured to select a ceremony that you don't feel 100% comfortable with!

You said that your vows are extremely important so I think you should make sure you love them! I'll pm you my ceremony/vows, you may not like them but I think they're sweet and they might give you some inspiration? I just picked from several different vows I read on the internet - took me maybe an hour and to me that hour was well spent :)

Good luck! xo

Thank you so much! That is a big help, its so hard to try and pull everything together and like you said you don't want to have exactly the same ceremony as someone else! I have pulled together a few bits and pieces and am having with how it is going so far.
 
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Re: Vows / Readings

Wed Sep 26, 2012 7:05 pm

I see a lot of ideas floating around on this post and here's another one. What about talking to your prospective celebrants first and finding out how they produce the ceremony and vows before booking? That way you can get a celebrant to match your style and personality.

I'm not contending with anyone here, but I pick up a level of discomfort in some of the posts with what has been presented by the celebrant.

Here's an extract from our code of practice
...The marriage celebrant must do the following
(a) give the parties information and guidance to enable them to choose or compose a marriage ceremony that will meet their needs and expectations;

For my understanding a Celebrant should work hard to provide the ceremony the bride and groom have in mind. :)
 
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Re: Vows / Readings

Mon Oct 01, 2012 11:10 am

we are getting our Celebrant to somewhat write them, but one reason we picked her was because she was able to articulate what we were trying to say without sounding mushy and I cannot speak in public well at all, so we said we like a bit of this one this one or this one , and FH did the same she writes something we say yeah like that but not that and on it goes.

Finding readings we both agreed on was really hard as I like poetry and FH said it sound like babbling to him but we settled on the
Apache blessing
and
a edited version of The Prophet on Marriage by Khalil Gibran
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